so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
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I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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