Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
