I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
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my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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