Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I need water and some morals
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
