all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
