Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong

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(516): View more from New York

i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car

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(847): View more from Illinois

No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.

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(760): View more from California

my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night

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(512): View more from Texas

I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate

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(850): View more from Florida

Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model

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(870): View more from Arkansas

He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number

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(315): View more from New York

Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.

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