dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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