I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
