Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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