I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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