Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
