i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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