they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
