Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
