You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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