Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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