i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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