Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
