Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Randomize