it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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