remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
3pm strippers are depressing
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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