u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
