Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
