He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
