If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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