Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize