well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
