Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
He had one of those small greek statue penises
time to smoke my breakfast
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
