is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
high people should be assigned attendants
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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