I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
We were destined to go to rehab together
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
