Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
The beer is more important than you right now.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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