yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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