you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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