Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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