dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize
