I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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