She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize
