.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
