Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
