Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize