My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
