I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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