My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
