My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
