i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize