i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
