Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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