I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Bring me that man meat
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
