I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I party with great urgency now.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
