That reminds me...we need to get swords
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
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I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
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What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
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