i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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